I see no escape from the girl at the video store

The moment I saw this poster on the wall in the neighborhood video store I wanted it. For one thing, it's a great film. But more importantly, it's a quintessential example of the fact that South Americans refuse to watch a movie if the plot is not explicitly explained in the title.

In English it was released as "In Bruges." What's written above translates to "The Conscience of the Assassin Hidden in Bruges." This system becomes a problem with such classics as "Thin Kid and the Ghost Psychiatrist" (The Sixth Sense) and "Star Wars: Episode V: I Can't Believe Darth Vader is Luke's Father."

When I saw that the 'In Bruges' poster had been covered by "That Silly, Bumbling Detective Clouseau" (The Pink Panther) I made my move. I had been in the store a few times and had seen the same stout young woman behind the counter every time. I wanted that poster badly, and I tried to be as charming as possible.

"You're here all the time, you must be the only employee," I said, casually looking around at all the posters. "You know I worked at a video store in the States..."

Well, I got the poster. But, at what price?
It turns she is the only employee.

I rent about six movies a week and she's been giving me looks like she thinks I'm only coming back every day to see her. She'll say things like "You couldn't possibly have finished that move already." I'm afraid that one day I'll come to the store and her father will be behind the counter instead, wating to ambush me a shotgun and a dowry.

My only hope is to rent a string of heavily gay-focused films to throw her off the scent.

Join me next Saturday for "What matters is not how far my feet have walked, but the journey I have made in my heart"